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TUESDAY, JANUARY 9

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Subj:  Switching races
Date: 01/08/2001 6:25:49 AM Pacific Standard Time
From: bam
To: webmistress@gorewon2000.net

Dear Diva,

Just yesterday, as we listened to the Sabbath Gasbags while cleaning the house, my husband exclaimed, "Beth!  We must be Black!"  For we had cheered as the CBC rose one by one to challenge the corrupt Florida electoral votes.  We are furious at the theft of Al Gore's presidency, and outraged at the right-wing's assault on democracy.

This morning, reading your column as forwarded by Online Journal, we laughed, because it's always comforting to discover that someone else shares your feelings.

Now, however, I'm thinking.  I think that everyone who shares this outrage should join the NAACP
and the Rainbow/PUSH organization.  Sign up.  Pay your dues.  Support their challenges, and let them know that you do.  And the next time someone asks you to fill out a form telling them what race you are, go ahead and check "black".  It'll drive the Junie Bush administration nuts when they do statistics in the next few years.

Beth

[DIVA NOTE:  I, TOO, AM GOING TO BE A PROUD, CARD-CARRYING MEMBER OF THE NAACP AND RAINBOW-PUSH (WHICH HAVE DONE SO MUCH FOR MY PEOPLE).]

[DIVA CONFESSION:  I WASN'T CHEERING WHEN THE CBC STOOD TO CHALLENGE THE ELECTORS, I WAS CRYING.  IT'S TRUE.  WHEN IT COMES TO SEEING HEROES IN THE FLESH, THE DIVA IS ONE BIG, WET HANKIE!]


AND NOW, FOR SOMETHING TOTALLY DIFFERENT…
A Grammatically Challenged Mole/Monkey Mailer
Throws a Three-E-Mail Hissy-Fit


Subj: Re: dumb?
Date: 01/08/2001 9:36:32 AM Pacific Standard Time
From: Burntgreens@aol.com
To:    <<SNIP>>
[DIVA NOTE:  This idiot sent his e-mails to my e-groups identity, NOT webmistress@gorewon2000.net, so I doubt he's ever even SEEN The BBBR]

EMAIL 1 (UNEDITED, AND IN ITS ENTIRETY):
after going through your site-I really dont see where you are any brighter than George------------sorry?

Okay, you are right.  I am not smart at all.  A total idiot.  A mouth-breather.  Not only that, but the fact that I graduated as Valedictorian, was a National Merit Scholar, and a Jeopardy Champion, are all just really, really, really weird coincidences.  Talk about your serendipity!

You have found me out, you clever, clever man!

E-MAIL 2 (UNEDITED, AND IN ITS ENTIRETY):
you support al gore(?)and then you welcome progressive to your site and,like al gore,pretend to be a progressive-al gore was(is) a joke-he is a pretend liberal-he doesnt have a true belief,at least Nader believed in something

Well, well, well… What have we here?  A little shift in tactics?  Done attacking The Diva and moving on to Al Gore?  Your earlier e-mail seemed to indicate you thought BUSH was the intelligent one, not NADER…

Having second thoughts?

I imagine an awful lot of Bush voters are feeling exactly as frightened as you are, and are repenting their vote for El Doofus just as piteously as you.  I can't grant you absolution, though.  Sorry…

Or… Maybe you are just a right-wingnut who thinks sowing a little dissention between Gore and Nader supporters might further your cause to destroy all goodness and decency in the known universe…

Sorry, Pal, you've got the wrong Diva.  This Diva don't play that.

Nice try, though, for a person with your obviously limited capabilities.  I applaud your effort.

YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS HIS THIRD E-MAIL!
TAKE THE DIVA'S WORD FOR IT!

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